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About Deviant Artist "Kat"30/Female/United States Recent Activity
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Mature content
Flames of Retribution :iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 0 0
Cold this ice, the stars above
Glare down upon a world in sleep
To crush the light, lingering deep
Within our souls, the fires of our love.
Where are you--the wings to speed my way
As night wanes to become an empty day?
Come and hold me through the night
Dreamer's touch, a love beyond ken
Stirs the heart, a soul's mistake
For while in shadows 'tis bright
Soon eternity is lost again
And all is dead when next I wake.
Lies drip like tears as forever's sworn
At last somewhere to go, to belong
Turned to ash--your fault when things go wrong
Left with more rage, a pain to be borne.
Where are you--the wings to speed my way
As night wanes to become an empty day?
Dark and ice consumes me, the light faded away--
Adrift in fog and nightmare, seized by hell today.
Come and hold me through the night
Dreamer's touch, a love beyond ken
Stirs the heart, a soul's mistake
For while in shadows 'tis bright
Soon eternity is lost again
And all is dead when next I wake.
What can you bid save living death
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 0 0
Bled Dry
Don’t wait for me,
for in the shadows of today’s revelation
lies the end of pain—
or nothing left to feel it.
Bleeding from every pore
as the striking blows of every hell-forsaken
word rain down, fading
to zero for a moment’s misplaced compassion.
Suffering in silence
as the light of your regard shines down:
neither love nor care, but
basic pity inflicted on the damned.
Speak no more, for empty
condolences ease not the darkness that eats
the heart and soul until
all that remains is the shell of what was.
When the blood flow slows
and the world grows dim as life flees the broken
form of your hope, the gates below
open to receive the shadow that only death can warm.
Abandoned to fate preordained
long before thy descent beyond oblivion’s fell mercy,
blood flowed without surcease
for the meaning lost—sacrificed at birth’s altar.
Life denied from the start,
self-murder thy absolution at day’s last gasp:
the death of hope what remains
in the lingering
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 1 3
Look aloft at the heavens, the myriad stars
Shimmering behind these clouds of deathly
Sorrow as you lay prostrate, bound and bleeding
At torment’s whims, mercy but a twilight delusion.
See again the faces of all you have loved
As twisted they taunt, swearing always to be
At your side as they sip away at your anguish,
Promising worlds of redeeming acceptance.
All lies that they whisper as your blood flows alone
In the deafening stillness of an ever-beating
Heart that longs to be held…just once to be loved
Through the silent suffering, crying hours from the grave.
Fast and loose with the truth, lies spewing
Forth madly from twisted lips setting up to
Undermine the small stretch of firm earth standing
Intact beneath you, cast adrift without anchor.
For one moment speak truly of the role you will play
On this stage of destiny, where the only goal
Seems but annihilation in the face of the loss--
Self-shredder that shoves you from cliffs to the wind.
Pray once more for futile dream
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 1 15
Mature content
Threshold :iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 1 1
Empty words slip from the soul unheard
To tumble forward down the slippery slope
That leads ever down to the underworld,
Unnoticed by the world at large this night.
Follow them down into the eternal demise
Awaiting all of the unseen, the sanctity of
Fragile lives crushed to dust beneath the heel
Of society’s boots--all those for whom truth twists.
Mere language ceased long since to express the
Brutal pointlessness of continuing on when form
Has long since faded to the realms of insignificance,
The final death from which there is no return.
Sans purpose, continue on into the droning
Silence that falls around you, all the while
Longing for some wind to fill thy wings
Once more, reclaimed from within emptiness.
What force of voice can ease the pain that
Emanates from a shattered being’s black home,
Dousing pain in the consuming light of comforting
Lies to ease the burden--if only for a moment’s time?
Diminish feeling, for the silence stands in wait
For a day when tears will
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 3 2
Mature content
Metallic Ending :iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 2 28
Gray World
Night beckons the restless spirits
Lost in time so long ago that the
Journey’s gone from eyes long blinded,
Though their feet still walk the path.
Weary walking come the dead
Toward the vacillating light that
Guides us forward ever on toward
Life’s demise through winter chill.
Search the faces, finding shattered
Visions of life gone badly wrong--
Though among us all they move,
Dead so long and always since.
Among these fallen travelers
Lost along forgotten roads comes a
Child born to naught but sorrow,
Nightmares marching in the flesh.
Gaze upon the babe too young
To bear so much and still survive,
Yet live it does through forces great
In need of toys for their delight.
Live to suffer, endless times
The mantra once again repeats
Until all comfort fades away
Before these words filling the world.
Destruction but a dream recalled
In face of landscapes painted red
And blue by blood and spilling tears
Trapped inside a broken mind.
Think you to save this useless child
For whom you&
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 0 33
Walking Away
Turn away again, o soul of the night sky--
To fall again before the cursed destiny that
Lies before you, the path ever traveled on
Through the darkness as the fires of deepest
Hells stand forth to do battle with you once more.
Abandon now all hope of salvation, for the grace
Of the highest was never meant for you--
Fated to cry again in unending cycles of agony
As those who claim love and friendship look on
At best with pity, if not scornful hatred or despair.
Try again to reach out in vain, yet still fail to spare
Thyself pains of a world in which you exist forever,
Living on though consumed by the unbearable heat
Of the dark wrath, unquenchable despair in the face of
Truth--no belonging, only emptiness thy companion.
If you survive the trials, look not to love for salvation:
Raging fear and boundless agony will keep you
Long after you should have been defeated utterly by
Sheer lack of hope.  Look within and know that you
Live, not through grace, but by curse of deathlessnes
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 0 9
Koldaran Thornblade
The first thing he remembered was crouching in the shadows of an alleyway unseen, watching people pass him by.  He was alone, and he knew from somewhere within him that no one was coming for him.  His stomach growled, but there was neither food nor water to be had.  No one would share with a monster…not even a very young one.  He was the equivalent of five human years old and already invisible; nameless, faceless among the crowd.  When people did look at him, it was with scorn, sometimes even a trace of fear as they walked, going out of their way not to come near him..    
He slowly grew to understand was a demon among the humans, elves and dwarves of the city.  Red-brown skin, vivid purple hair coming from between the straight horns, a tail and solid silver eyes identified him as being a tiefling--a member of an ancient, originally human lineage that had sold themselves to darkness long ago, though he
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 1 32
If you want it, take it:
Futile struggles to uphold the pillar of resentment
And fear that proves the forge of your life,
The sole reason you continue on this path to annihilation.
Surrender to pain infinite:
Let it consume you, devouring your blood until you drown
In the suffering inflicted by immortal body
Upon the mind and soul destined only to fall time and again.
Scream for me once more:
Die upon the curse borne by time back to you without release,
Unrelenting in its magnanimous gift of despair
As you face the knowledge that all you loved will soon be lost.
What point anymore:
Living in squalor’s shadowy embrace until end of days encroach
Upon a broken, defeated soul long dead,
Destroyed by the very things it first sought to protect and cherish?
Take it away now:
The death and darkness that does naught but destroy all in its path
As it latches onto those who cannot
Comprehend the burden posed by hoping light will shine for you again.
Abandon hope:
Reach for me…take the p
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 0 2
Mature content
Finding the Center :iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 3 8
Mature content
Welcome to Reality :iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 2 4
Fade to Black
Leave me tonight as the heavens
Open wide in endless embrace, calling
To the darkness of soul that brought
Me to this pass.  Emptiness fills
The heart and mind as I reach
Blindly for something, anything to
Hang onto, but there was never more
Than nothing in this vast space.
In the end, I will sleep
In the lake of sorrows,
Drowning in the ice of my
Own, unremitting pain.  
Praying to be lost forever
Midst the shadowed expanse
Of all that I fear, all to no
Avail…I can’t disappear.
As I drift upon the empty space
That as yet I am still separate from,
Look down and see others cavorting
Beneath the weight of the darkness,
Free to roam as I am not.  Dreams
Race through the mind that beholds
But cannot join the dance, for those
Below remain tied to time and fate.
Gazing beneath the empty plane of this vast space
Where I lay dying yet still alive, I can’t disappear
No matter how strong the desire.  Curse the fate
That intervenes as I ask:&
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 1 10
Time of Dying
This doesn't hurt.  She will tell herself until she believes it, or until she goes insane.  Or until she dies.  It really doesn't matter at this point.  She feels disconnected as she lies on the cold stone floor, a pool of red soaking the slashed cloth around the gaping wound in her back.  Several minutes have passed since the short sword penetrated her flesh, though to Kita's mind it has been only seconds.  It’s hard for her to tell if time has simply decelerated, or if it has stopped altogether.  It could be both.  
She knows that her injuries will prove fatal unless she gets treatment, and she doesn't care.  Being a healer, she knows her body better than her own name, and can catalogue her trouble spots with a high degree of accuracy.  Her left lung was lacerated by the blade, and is already collapsing.  Massive internal bleeding, possibly caused by a tear in an arteria
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 1 54
Love Beyond Death
As the silence of eternity
Closes in, the skies open up
And weep for all that has been lost,
For in the emptiness I seek you still.
Years have passed as I’ve drifted onward,
Heart open and bleeding as I scream
Your name, praying to all that is divine
That after all this time you will hear me.
With all that I am, I hope for just
One chance, a single moment to say
Goodbye to what was never mine
To keep…the innocence of love.
In the dark of the moon I pretend
That you are with me still, looking
Over my shoulder as I try in vain
To recall how it felt to hold you close.
But no matter how I hope to see you
Once again, you are forever
Beyond my reach, lost in the ashes
Of these fading memories.
Come back to me for a single night
So I can remember how it feels
To be loved, needed by someone
In this vast and empty universe.
Tear out my soul one more time, and
Offer what little remains to this
Endless, agonized oblivion…
Just to feel again for a moment.
I see your shadow everywher
:iconkuroicalidra:kuroicalidra 5 7

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Here's yet another of the little games that few, if anyone, cares about.  It's either keep doing this, or court a bullet.  C'est la fucking vie...

Four names that people call me (though the last two haven't been used in at least five years):
1. Amanda
2. Kat
3. G.I. Kitty
4. Fluffy

Four jobs I have had:
1. Telemarketer
2. Production Operator at a semiconductor manufacturer
3. Print tester
4. Mystical Troubleshooter

Four movies I would watch more than once:
1. Samurai X: Trust and Betrayal
2. Wing Commander
3. Bless the Child
4. Legally Blonde (much as I hate to admit it…)

Four places I have lived:
1. Sunnyvale, California
2. Boise, Idaho
3. Abruzzo Province, Italy (if a month counts)
4. A naval base in the Great Lakes area, near Chicago

Four places I have been:......
1. Paramount's Great America (San Jose, CA) and the Monterey Bay Aquarium (Monterey, CA)
2. Rome, Florence, Naples (etc.), Italy
3. Chicago, Illinois
4. Lagoon Amusement Park (Salt Lake City, UT)

Four People who e-mail, text or call regularly:
1. Dawn
2. James
3. Dave
4. Pop-can (a.k.a. "baby dragon" or "Chris")

Four of my favorite foods:
1. beef stew
2. tacos
3. strawberry ice cream
4. ripe apricots

Four places I'd rather be right now:
1. Hiding in the void
2. Flying…doesn't matter how I'm doing it
3. On some random, isolated plane of existence
4. Basically, anywhere but here and now…

Four friends I think will respond:
1. None.  The other numbers are irrelevant.

Four things I am looking forward to this year:
1. No clue.  I don't think that anything particularly good will happen in the near future.

Four TV shows that I watch:
1. Supernatural
2. Criminal Minds
3. Fringe
4. House

Now, here's what you're supposed to do...if you want to.
Copy and paste this into a new journal.  Erase my answers and type in yours.

Farewell to irrelevance yet again.
  • Listening to: "Whataya Want From Me" by Adam Lambert
  • Reading: Nothing that matters
  • Watching: My computer screen
  • Playing: The game of life...
  • Eating: Not right now
  • Drinking: Something other than water


United States
Current Residence: The darkness within my soul
Favourite genre of music: Rock/Nu Metal/Emo
Favourite style of art: Fantasy and/or anime
Operating System: Windows
MP3 player of choice: iRiver
Shell of choice: black-and-silver
Personal Quote: The only thing worse than true immortality are the memories borne in that eternal isolation.


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SHiNiGAMi-Xiii Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2014  Professional General Artist
(= :+fav: əɥʇ ɹoɟ sʞuɐɥʇ
Phoenixel-AB Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2013   Digital Artist
Thank you for adding my work to your favorites :)
Inferiae Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thankies for the fav! :D
Catalina-Estefan Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
nice gallery!!!
JenaDellaGrottaglia Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
thanks so much for faving my work very appreciated!
kuroicalidra Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2012
You're welcome.
Phoenixel-AB Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2012   Digital Artist
Thank you for adding Trance to your favs! :la:
tr4ze Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2011
thx a lot for your :+fav: :D
AF-studios Featured By Owner Oct 20, 2011
Thank you so much for adding my work to your favorites :heart:
kuroicalidra Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
You're welcome.
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